Mistress on His Terms Page 6
As soon as was decently possible, he left the women happily conferring on party arrangements and followed Hugo to his study for an after-dinner drink.
“Well, what do you think of her?” Helping himself to the one daily cigar his doctor allowed, Hugo settled in his favorite chair and regarded Sebastian curiously.
Weighing the port decanter’s heavy crystal stopper on the palm of his hand, Sebastian tossed the question back. “More to the point, what do you think of her?”
“I find her very generous. Very willing to forgive.”
“She has nothing to be forgiving about, Hugo. You’re the one who was betrayed.”
“But she doesn’t know that. She thinks I walked away from her and left another man to assume my parental responsibilities. In my opinion, Neil Talbot more than proved himself up to the job.”
“How did you explain having apparently abandoned her?”
“I didn’t.” Hugo accepted the glass Sebastian handed to him. “I gave her an abbreviated version of the truth, and told her how deeply I regretted not having exercised my paternal options.”
“You have nothing to feel remorseful about, Hugo, and she needs to know that.”
“Nevertheless, I’ve been burdened by guilt for the last twenty-six years.” He made a gesture of appeal. “What if Neil had resented being saddled with another man’s child? What if he’d deserted Genevieve and she’d fallen on hard times? If she hadn’t been able to keep her baby, Lily could have been placed in foster care or adopted by strangers, and lost to me forever.”
“Why torture yourself with ‘what if’s?’ None of those things happened.”
“But I didn’t know that until a few months ago. I didn’t even know if Genevieve gave birth to a son or a daughter, and that preyed on my mind a very great deal. No matter how many other good things came into my life, there was always this big empty space where another child should have been.”
“Your whereabouts were never a secret. If things had not gone well for Genevieve, she knew where to find you and you’d have been the first to hear about it.” He savored a mouthful of the port, before continuing, “At the very least, she’d have come after you for child support. From everything you’ve told me about her, she was above all else a survivor.”
“Until her luck ran out.” Hugo inspected the glowing tip of his cigar critically. “I’ve always appreciated your loyalty, Sebastian. More than anyone else, you’ve been the one who’s comforted me the most when the past came back to haunt me. I’ve been able to talk to you about things I could never discuss with your mother. But you have to promise me you won’t let what you know about Genevieve taint your feelings toward Lily.”
“That’s a tall order, given the circumstances. It’s not as if you never made an effort to get to know her. How old was she when you tried to make contact—fifteen, sixteen?”
“Just turned fourteen. And remember, I addressed my inquiries to her mother and never did contact Lily directly.”
Sebastian shrugged. “She was old enough to make up her own mind, regardless of any outside pressure that might have been brought to bear on her. And she chose to rebuff your overtures.”
“You’re assuming she knew of them, but from what I gathered in our conversation before dinner, clearly she didn’t. If you’re going to assign blame, Sebastian, then blame me. I could have pursued the matter but I chose not to, and gave up hope of ever getting to know my first born. It’s sad that the opportunity to reverse that decision rose out of someone else’s tragedy but I’m deeply grateful I’ve been given another chance.”
“I’m not trying to spoil your reunion, Hugo, but I can’t help feeling Lily’s turned to you now out of some sort of expediency, and that makes me uneasy. I don’t want to see you hurt again.”
“Keep an open mind, Sebastian. You can do that, can’t you?”
“Sure,” he said. “Until she gives me reason to think otherwise, I’ll accept the person she appears to be.”
It was as close as he could come to saying what Hugo wanted to hear, without telling an outright lie. But Sebastian remained more determined than ever to have Lily Talbot investigated.
When they emerged from the study an hour later, they found Natalie alone at the table in the breakfast room, a stack of books and a notepad in front of her. “Mother’s in the hot tub,” she told her father.
“And Lily?” Hugo asked.
“Walking Katie. She said she needed to stretch her legs before she turned in.”
“Then I think I’ll join your mother. A bit of aqua therapy might help my back spasms. Sebastian, we’ll see you a week from Saturday, if not sooner?”
“Count on it,” he said. “I’d never miss your birthday, Hugo, you know that.”
He watched his stepfather head back into the house, noticing the slight limp and the way he paced himself carefully, as if every step hurt. “He’s in pain.”
“I know it. He’d never have opted out of meeting Lily’s flight otherwise.” Natalie regarded him slyly. “His bad luck was your good fortune, though, wasn’t it?”
“How so?”
“You know…you and Lily. Alone!”
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Surely the woman hadn’t spilled the beans about their sharing the same bed the night before? If she had, he’d have her head!
“Oh, come off it, Sebastian! You can hardly keep your eyes off her and you practically come unglued every time she looks back at you.”
“I what?”
Natalie snickered. “Did you really think I wouldn’t notice? I’ve known you all my life, brother dear, and while I admit I haven’t seen it happen often, I recognize the signs. You’re smitten.”
“You’ve had too much sun,” he told her testily. “It’s all I can do to be civil to the woman.”
“So I noticed. It’s what first tipped me off.”
“The little boys you run around with might develop infatuations on the strength of twenty-four hours’ acquaintance, Nat, but men my age—!” He stopped and banged the heel of his hand to his forehead. “Why am I defending myself against this absurd accusation?”
“I’m wondering the same thing,” she smirked.
He yanked gently on a lock of her hair. “Hit the books, kiddo, and leave the psychoanalysis to the experts. You’re way off base with this one.”
“You’re leaving before Lily gets back from her walk?”
“You bet,” he said. “I’ve seen enough of her for one day.”
“Do me a favor before you go.” She flipped through her notes and handed him a slip of paper. “See if there’s a copy of this book in the library, will you? Dad said he thought there might be.”
“Sure.”
He headed back into the house and crossed the hall. The library door stood ajar and swung quietly open at his touch. Evening sunlight streamed through the long windows, casting a golden patina over the cherrywood desk, and spotlighting Lily Talbot kneeling before the open door of one of the glass-fronted cabinets under the bookcases.
For a moment he watched her, noting her absorption. Several large leather-bound albums lay on the floor beside her, suggesting she’d been there for some time.
“The last I heard, even dogs as smart as Katie aren’t interested in learning to read,” he said, finally making his presence known.
She almost jumped out of her skin. Her startled exhalation gusted across the room and the book she’d been inspecting slipped from her hands. “Heavens, you scared me!”
“So it would seem. Exactly what are you doing in here?”
“Looking at old family photos,” she said. “Hugo’s got pictures going back a hundred and fifty years. There are some of my great-great-grandfather when he was a boy. And look!” She leafed through one of the albums on the floor beside her. “This is one of my great-grandmother when she was about my age. You can see the family resemblance. We have the same shaped face and eyes.”
He didn’t budge. “You were supposed to be walking
the dog. At least, that’s the impression you gave Natalie.”
“I tried, but Katie was more interested in the river and I wasn’t sure it was safe for her to be in the water, so I cut the walk short.”
“And decided instead to poke around in here and help yourself to whatever took your fancy. Sneaking through other people’s private possessions is practically an Olympic sport with you, isn’t it?”
“Hugo gave me permission to look through the family albums whenever I please. How else do you think I knew where to find them? And you’re a fine one to talk about being sneaky! I didn’t notice you being very forthcoming about the fact that the reason you never invite anyone in the family to visit your town house is that you have your pregnant ladylove holed up there.”
It wasn’t often he found himself at a loss for words, but this latest broadside, wide of the mark though it was, left him temporarily speechless. “My ladylove?” he finally managed to say.
“Pregnant ladylove. Let’s not gloss over that small fact.”
Working hard to keep a straight face, he said, “You mean, you actually deal with fact on occasion—when you’re not jumping to wildly inaccurate conclusions, that is?”
“Sneer all you like,” she spat. “I know what I saw. All that hugging and kissing, not to mention the length of time you left me twiddling my thumbs while the pair of you…”
She trailed off and gnawed her bottom lip, looking uncertain all at once.
“Well, hell, don’t stop now, Lily,” he said mockingly. “I can hardly wait to hear the rest.”
“You went upstairs.” Something fascinating about her left forefinger captured her attention and prevented her from meeting his gaze. “I saw the bedroom light go on.”
“Pity I didn’t leave a ladder strapped to the top of the car. You could have used it to gain a better view of what was going on up there and blackmailed me with what you witnessed.”
She shot him a venomous glare. “No need to be sarcastic, Sebastian. I assume she’s married and that’s why you’re so reluctant to let anyone in the family know about her. Well, don’t worry. Your secret’s safe with me.”
“It had better be,” he said, deciding the game had gone on long enough, “because the woman you saw is indeed married, although she’s not my mistress, nor is that my child she’s carrying. She happens to be the friend and client of a colleague, temporarily hiding out from a violent, abusive husband who’s already threatened her safety and attempted to flee the country with their three-year-old son. The boy happened to wake up from his nap yesterday while I was there, which no doubt explains why you saw a light go on in an upstairs window. Sorry if that’s not colorful enough to satisfy your overactive imagination, but it happens to be the truth.”
“Oh,” she said, sounding as if she’d had the wind knocked out of her.
He eyed her grimly. “Under no circumstances is what I’ve told you to leave this room.”
“Of course not. And…” She worried her lip again. “I owe you an apology. I’m afraid I accused you unjustly.”
“You certainly did,” he said, strolling to the reference section to find the book Natalie needed. “Afternoon quickies, crammed in between other appointments, aren’t my style at all. Where seduction’s concerned, I like to take my time.
Her eyes grew big as saucers and she blushed like a rose. Enjoying her discomfiture, he located the book, then made for the door. “Oh, yes, and one more thing,” he said by way of a parting shot. “Contrary to what you might have been brought up to expect, not every woman has the morals of an alley cat and jumps into bed with whichever man happens to take her fancy.”
The sky had faded to purple but the heat of the day still lay thick on the air when he finally got back to his apartment. A perfect ending to a less than perfect day, he thought, opening all the windows to the night scent of Hugo’s flower gardens.
He still had a briefcase full of notes to go over, a string of phone calls to return and a sluggish lack of enthusiasm for tackling either. Too much good food and wine, on top of more irritation than any one man should have to suffer in a day, and not nearly enough exercise, he decided. What he needed was a long run.
Ignoring the flashing light on his telephone answering machine, he changed into shorts and T-shirt, grabbed a towel and set off down the narrow driveway leading from the stables to the road. Settling into an easy stride, he passed through the gates, turned right and jogged up the shoulder of the hill on the first leg of an arduous five-mile circuit.
Such grueling punishment should have been enough to banish Lily Talbot from his thoughts. With any other woman, it would have been. But the memory of her—the sound of her voice, her disturbingly attractive mouth, the sweep of her glossy hair—went with him, buzzing around in his mind like a mosquito and giving him no peace at all.
Because of her, he was deceiving Hugo, if not overtly then certainly by omission. That alone was reason enough to resent her. That he also found himself fascinated by her merely added to his irritation. She was stylish and carefree and unpredictable. She was everything he didn’t want in a woman. Left to her own devices, she’d derail his entire life and everyone else’s that he cared about.
He was not a man given to fanciful notions; logic, cause and effect—these were the touchstones by which he pursued his profession. Yet he could not rid himself of the superstitious feeling that she spelled trouble. For what seemed like the hundredth time, Sebastian wished she’d never come into their lives.
Hugo and Cynthia had made an early night of it. Natalie was holed up in her room studying. Save for the grandfather clock chiming eleven in the front hall, the house was silent.
It had been an emotionally exhausting two days and she should have been tired, but after an hour of tossing and turning in bed, Lily gave up on sleep. Too many questions about the past still remained unanswered.
Why had her mother never told her about Hugo? He seemed such a decent man, so eager to welcome her into his family. It was difficult to reconcile that with the fact that he’d never come forward as her father until she searched him out.
When she’d tried asking him why he’d let another man raise her, he’d been evasive. There was something he wasn’t telling her; she could feel it in her bones. She sensed, too, that there was a hurt in him that ran very deep.
Flinging back the sheet, she climbed out of bed and went to lean on the sill of the open window beside the desk. At the foot of the garden, the river slid silently past, a ribbon of dark silk in the starlit night. By craning her neck, she could see over the treetops to the roof of the building that Natalie had told her was where Sebastian had his apartment. A light glimmered through the branches, showing he was home.
Everyone around her had a sense of place, of belonging. They all knew where they’d sprung from and where they were headed. Only she was adrift in a sea of uncertainty. Despite her warm welcome here, she remained alone. The sense of connection that came from knowing she belonged just wasn’t there yet. Maybe it never would be. Maybe she’d never really feel part of this family.
That she was even here at all was a matter of luck. If she hadn’t found among her mother’s possessions the envelope containing old photographs, a marriage license and her own birth certificate, she’d never have known Genevieve had been married before or that Neil Talbot wasn’t her biological father. Given her happy childhood, it shouldn’t have mattered. But it did. The people she’d trusted the most had deceived her.
All at once, the spacious, elegant room was too confining, too suffocatingly hot and humid. Her cotton nightshirt stuck to her skin. She ran a finger inside the neck, suddenly longing for the cool Pacific night air of Vancouver; for the gentle sigh of the sea breeze stirring the branches of the western hemlock tree outside her apartment window.
A flicker of light below and to her right drew her attention to the faint prick of stars reflected on the calm surface of the swimming pool. Inspired, she exchanged the nightshirt for a bathing suit, took a t
owel from the bathroom and stole through the quiet house to the French doors leading to the back terrace.
Except for a series of mushroom-shaped lights lining the path, the garden lay in darkness—until she rounded the corner to the tiled deck of the pool, that was, when a pair of motion-activated floodlights flared to life and, contrary to what she’d expected, showed that she was not the only one bent on a late-night swim.
A seal-dark head broke the surface of the water and a voice, unmistakably Sebastian’s and unmistakably ticked-off, echoed across the pool. “What the hell…! Who’s out there?”
“Me,” she said, stepping forward. “I came to swim.”
“Well, forget it,” he snapped. “I got here first.”
How like him to think he could chase her off as if she were a common trespasser! “I think it’s safe to say the pool’s plenty big enough for two.”
“I’m willing to bet I can change your mind on that.”
She dropped her towel, kicked off her sandals and very deliberately stepped onto the diving board. “I doubt it. I’ve never been one to back down to a bully.”
“Hold it right there, Lily!”
“Why should I?”
With smooth, powerful strokes, he swam to the far end of the pool, the water flashing like diamonds around him. “Because, if you’re determined to butt in where you’re not wanted, you’ll have to get rid of the swimsuit first.”
“That’s one of the house rules, is it?” she said, her words dripping with sarcasm.
“Tonight it is.”
“And why is that, Sebastian?”
“There’s an old proverb that goes along the lines of When in Rome—”
“Do as the Romans. I’m familiar with it, surprising though you might find that.”
“Then you ought to be able to figure out why the swimsuit comes off before you come in. You saw last night how I like to get rid of my clothes the first chance I get, Lily. I’m buck naked in here.”
Her mother had been a stickler for good manners. It’s impolite to stare had been one of the first rules of etiquette she’d impressed on her daughter. It wasn’t enough to stop Lily’s eyes from almost popping out of her head now, though. “You’re what?”